opal necklace

She likes grey, grey days and the tangerine dawn. She likes the dew settled on the lawn. Elegant trees that dance in the breeze. To be wrapped in her yellow coat. she spins like the branches that stretch and spin themselves towards the heavens. She likes the stars that map out the skies she loves the stars when they gleam in green eyes. Big pink mugs full of cinnamon hot chocolate and christmas carols in June. She loves lace gloves and red berets and bathing in the moon. She likes boys in flares with wild long hair and rock running through their veins. She likes free love and daisy chains and little towns with country lanes. She likes shiny coins and burning loins the kind they get in romance novels. She likes the letters he wrote on paper with dried flowers, paper that smelt of lily. She likes buttons on shoes, hat pins, brooches, when little girls are silly. She loves the women in those old classic films, who talk like they're always surprised. Those scenes from books that you wish were real. Fabrics that look as nice as they feel. It hangs from her neck stopping just before her chest. The thing she'll always love the best. The thing he bought her to make up for all the pain, that whimsical little opal on its white gold chain.

after this maybe I'll try a happy one?

This room is an ice box, severe and cold
To lay here forever and stay young or get old,
I don’t really care what happens to me,
I have the window, grey sky, flowered tree

Suspended in bliss, day after day
night after night, let me waste away,
is waste too shocking a word?
Is wanting to waste a little absurd?
I’m afraid I’m lacking a prettier word
let me fade, let me fade.
Like a name on a page

Is it because you’re selfish?
Or you like too control?
You’re tainting my soul.
Was breaking my spirit far too delish
To pass up?

Day after day, pushed into a box with no air
Full of happy people,
pair after pair,
you’re not good enough,
they stare and they stare

but in this room,
with its window and rainy grey sky
you imagine yourself away.
If only you knew how to try.
Then they’d all see
Just how good you could be.
I’m good,
I’m good,
I swear it.

beautifullll

Now I have my alligator shoes I really want a cloche...... :(

aren't they gorgeous? I am going to pull off this glamour goddess look!!!! I don't care how long it takes me.

If anyone is secretly in love with me and wants to buy me things.....get me a cloche :|


fucking valentines day

a horrid shade of grey

My cheeks used to flush rose
and my eyes they flashed with green
you liked me when I was funny
you liked it when I was mean

You started to change
I wrote you a letter
explaining how change
wasn't always for the better

No response,
Perhaps you didn't read it?
Or perhaps, as I fear,
you simply didn't need it

Not like me
I needed to tell you
but it didn't seem to work
so I'll try out something new

I give up, give up
all my defences have been shot to hell
your free to tight lace me
then I'll never tell
in a corset, in your arms
they feel the same to me

don't they do the same thing?
trap me in for you
I'd like to think they'd stop this all
if they only knew
but this is just what's normal

I gave it all up
just to please you
i cannot breathe
I'm turning blue

blue blue blue
a sea of blue
and all they ever want
is to tell me what to do

just like you
just like you!

I only have myself to blame
for all i do is listen
listen listen
and fear

Fear what? Fear who?
I fear them
I fear you

but there's no real reason to
for you have already killed me

There will be no justice here
because all you did was make me fear
the fear it made its way inside
and one day I realised that I'd died

Ladies and Gentleman of the jury,
you won't avenge my death!
for you don't believe me
The cold still shows my breath

it doesn't mean they didn't kill me
the rules, the rules, the rules
they think you put up with me
the fools the fools the fools

You pulled me in and crushed me up
until I was almost gone
replaced me with a girl
timid, like a fawn

Here's a rule for you,
don't tell me what to feel
you've really truly ruined me
tried to tell me what was real

Now I'm blended grey,
even you, know it's not okay

I'm no use to anyone
it's over
I'm done