The stage.

You're too late babydoll
you have the stage
we've met the end
so come on and take a bow

we put on quite a show
for them
but the audience never loved you
how could that be true?

When you worked for them so long
put your faded best foot forward
poured your heart into the song

you were such a lovely doll
but no one wants to play.
broken porcelain draws blood
from pretty fingers

fallen from a pedestal
into ashes
would you have fallen if he'd held onto your hand?
you let go

you hadn't planned to fall
but you can plan to rise again

Alone but free.
Ready to be brave.
Ready to be true.
The end is just the start anew.

So babydoll

Take your bow



a video of me reading this latest attempt at being poetical :/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTkO0rL5t04

Jacarandas

The pale blossoms that bloomed
with the coming of spring are already slipping away from the sky

falling from branches that cannot cling

to fragility;
bursting with beauty then plunging, dry,
to the ground.

The heat is blazing

Fallen onto the shimmering concrete of summer
And trampled underfoot

Torn display of overpowering decay

The blending purple innocence is crushed
on each mournful morning commune
it has become easier to tread over nature
no guilty hearts; lips are hushed.

The heat is blazing.

Beaded skin sticks to my seat
Prickling with sweat
Bound by the heat
To each surface I brush up against.

In that light summer frock
I watched the flowers tremble and tumble
It came as a shock to me
That, that is the destiny of all

In a flash my youth shall be gone
and what will I have to show?

The heat is blazing.I can feel it burn.

untitled

don't tell them.
do not let your tongue
take the trip
along your teeth

to loop or dip
stumble; slip the confession
because your heart is just too small
to hold it anymore

it's a stinging realisation
but they will not be your salvation

please retract your statement
so we can cross you off the list
no moment wasted; time spent
on your cries anymore

we will ask you one more time
"are you okay?"
and they told me you were clever
so please don't say
you aren't

I will no say yes
and I will not say no
but behold! and lo!
what I see is not a star

those swirling sparkled dots
each one a dreamed up wish
that never did come true
for me at least

because each night at my window
I searched out to the sky
grabbed at one glinting star
and wished that I would die

but here I am before you
still taking up each wretched breath
I should have been more specific
when I wished the universe for death

because all they did was suck
all the pleasure from my lips
so each step I take; have taken in awhile
is as hollow as your eyes when you look at me and smile

I'm in a white washed wooden boat
and water is pooling at my feet.
there are cracks like spider webs
running up my seat

I can't see the hole but I promise you I'm sinking

now I'm left to thinking
If I call out through the dark
and dear god all there is, is dark
will someone call on back with the sweetness of a lark?

or shall I pray now to St Anthony?
because I'm well and truly lost
but I can't bear the cost

of calling out again
just to have someone stand on shore
have them grasp my hand
take a flying leap to land

just to fall lower than before
not that I even thought it possible.

So I won't say yes
and I won't say no
but I will have you know
my soul was torn to ribbons long before I met you

I just tried to tie them up in bows
make me pretty fresh and new
but I guess that didn't work
so I won't try it again

I'll cut my crimson ribbons free
so they can dance in the breeze.
please don't stare at me so
a girl can't be on show
when her eyes have sprung a leak.

I must confess a great relief
I've kept secret all along
there are better ways than wishing stars
so you won't be burdened by me

for long.

Happy
I said
Happy
I thought
Happy, happy. what's that?

come back to me.
a plea I can't believe is real.
come back to me.
I forgot just how you made me feel.

there's a new boy now
he's not like you
we smile and live in an arrow straight street
lined by trees with candy leaves; so sweet

but candy sweet makes baby teeth, decay
till all the sublime, star lit dreams,
lose their luster and and my mind starts to stray

back to you.
how it could have been
If I'd come back to you
not candy sweet but something else
that meant I didn't need to dust my life with sugar

and then again by chance we meet
when I told myself you were nothing
standing there, just in the street
I could hardly tell if you were real
you'd been a dream so often

I never knew I'd missed so much;
your eyes, your honest eyes
unknowingly cruel fingers brush my arm, salvation's touch
"how are you?" My heart unknowingly lies

Happy I said.
happy I thought.
but as you turned, exit stage left
and I walked away with him.
I realised, candy sweet is easily bought
but happy, happy? what's that?

the last one for you

I can't stop wondering how it happened
I'd never do it now
I can't tell how
I ever let it happen

It wasn't happiness that I felt
you made me giddy and sore
it was some sort of fake goodness
based on settling the score

of hurts and wrongs and make me ups
and revenge against them all
was it really what you wanted?
lies and tears and shake me ups
and don't pick up the call

I was just a kid
you should have known
you should've done it better

I was just a girl
you were grown
no love in your love letter
but how was I to know?

I think I know why
I believed the lie
and it's not because you spun it well

neither you or I
knew the lie.
real happiness was foreign
so we mistook a dizzying spell
of something else, for happy

I don't miss you now
and I know how
and why. I've not reached the stars
the sky. but finally.
I'm happy

backwards

Tell me a secret and I'll spin you an imagining.
I like the made up worlds.
my life won't work the right way.
I beg them to be by my side and they run
I tell them to go and they stay.

If I want something with all my heart
it crumbles in my hand
but something I don't want; deserve?
through storms, disaster, it will stand.

my life has come out backwards.
a backwards girl too highly strung.
prone to tears and hurting.
She says she's had it. She's done with them.

but her lips? they keep on flirting.
Don't look at me with honest eyes.
Peering through my soul of sickened lies.

Lies I wish were truths.

I really try at so little. I've only a few real wishes.
wishes nobody hears.
So I'll wash out my wishes.
Baptise myself in tears.

Be new and fresh holding no hopes
no tears clouding my eyes
no fears shrouding the skies.

Right way front and gleaming pretty.
A girl I've never been before.
A girl they've never seen before.

Oh just you wait and see
the things that I will be, oh yes,
the things that I will be

please ignore any poetry where I sound like I've ever been in love